Itty bitty tiny steps

Powerlessness is my least favorite feeling, and lately I feel powerless. I do not know how to be the change I wish to see in the world; I do not know how to feel about my future, seeking joy, or a lot of other things that I felt a bit more certain of a week ago.

So I'm focusing on the tiniest of steps.

I've decided to try to lower my personal carbon footprint in baby steps.

I was running out of shampoo and conditioner, and using a drugstore brand that has who-knows-what in it, so I decided that I'd do some research on what a more environmentally responsible choice would be. (I landed on Avalon Organics products, which don't break the bank, are widely available, and have the highest rating from The Environmental Working Group.) When I got into the shower this morning to wash my hair, I thought "I can't change the world, but I can change this..." as I lathered and rinsed.

My shampoo choice will, sadly, not save the planet. But... it's something. It's teeny tiny, so small as to be miniscule.

But it's something.

Right now, I don't know what to think of the world and my country, and I don't know how to make meaningful change.

So I'm going to focus on the smallest things.

Making conscious choices about products - maybe imperfectly (the contents of that bottle get a gold star, but what about the plastic container?), but better than before. 

I'm thinking that I really could buy less on mail order, and patronize my local stores more when I need something.

I'm thinking about how cold it's becoming, and going through my house to find blankets to donate to the local shelter.

I'm thinking about making something delicious to put in the break room at work, just because.

I sent a dozen Thanksgiving cards to people in my life, telling them how much I appreciate them.

It's not enough, clearly. It doesn't end racism and misogyny, for starters, and it doesn't improve the wealth gap. It doesn't end wars, or help starving children.

But it's something, and something is better than nothing.

Today I vow to find more tiny steps to do just a little bit better.